RDF Stories

[Eldarion]

A little bear tank wants to be exalted with The Lorewalkers and sees in the Dungeon Finder the way to finally get that reputation. After days of tests, fails and bugs, the server seems to have fully implemented the bonus reputation, so let's queque for RDF!

 

[spoiler=Chapter 1: Queque]

Will The Lorewalkers bless me for searching richness, ehm, knowledge doing dungeons?

 

http://i.imgur.com/nYocHRN.png

 

300x20 + guild perk = 6900 reputation, 6 times and I'll be exalted, let's do it!

 

The Missing Healer

There is not a single time that the healer is already there sitting with a coffee cup in his hands: let's wait 4min, that soon will become 15 because to have a coffee you need to make it...

 

http://i.imgur.com/cyeKYtX.png

 

The DPS Conspiracy

Happends 90% of the times that while waiting, as in every "Conspiracy Theory", the DPS with mind powers talk each other and decide who will fake an AFK to make the queque fail. Don't desperate, there is a 10% that the AFK will be real!

http://i.imgur.com/TMMm6O8.png

 

http://i.imgur.com/L90rAzj.png

 

Repeat Loop

A true fact is that getting a DPS replacement usually takes the same time of losing the healer, who usually queque and leave the queque if the party is not already ready for him. No, I don't want to be mean with healers, I'll probably will with tanks if I was healing: I'm just joking.

 

 

 

[spoiler=Chapter 2: It's Random!]

"Give me Stormshout Brewery, give me Stormshout Brewery, give me Stormshout Brewery... No Scholomance nooo!!"

[/Quote]

 

Ready to enter: Gate of the Setting Sun

• Statistically, you'll end the only avaiable boss before the poor "first time guy" will have loaded
  
• After killing the only working boss people will round around without a purpose, but they won't talk or ask anything
  
• Well, you won't get any reputation bonus if you didn't figure out, but at least will be a short pain
  

"and now?"

[/Quote]

 

Ready to enter: Scarlet Monastry

• There is only 1 fuel tank in all the instance, chance that someone will hit it and kill him self are 75%
  
• The 1st boss is smooth
  
• The 2nd boss is smooth... oh, wait, the adds before
  
• Random teams will usually wipe in the road before the 2nd boss
  
• Respawn point is in Westfall, yes, Westfall
  
• If the team survives to the 2nd boss it will easily get to the end
  

"Stay close to the walls. Don't pull all the adds!"

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"Pull them! Pull them ALL!"

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Ready to enter: Scholomance

• It's the worst instance possible, so likely to be the one everyone gets while in queque
  
• Random teams won't reach the 1st boss: oh 10 ghosts appears, let's leave them alive!
  
• If you die and release you won't go in Westfall anymore, but you'll be gifted with a very nice ress sickness
  
• Before each boss the adds will be the most pain... or maybe leavers are
  
• Only a very good team can reach the end, it's the only heroic instance I yet have to solo (not that I tried)
  
• Why in the world 440ilv requirement only?
  

"Scholomance #@*$!"

[/Quote]

 

Ready to enter: Siege of Niuzao Temple

• Without language differences or misunderstandings would be very easy
  
• People never listen on the 2nd boss and die
  
• Obviously, by Demolishers explosion
  
• You can release and run back, don't you know?
  
• If you are dead the 2nd boss will bug permanently
  
• Killing the 2nd boss won't be the end, but in 90% of my experience the party leaves before going on
  

"Stay away from the stairs"

[/Quote]

 

Ready to enter: Stormshout Brewery

• Let me say it, you can't fail this
  
• I lied, there are still people dying by hitting the sleeping monkeys
  
• A random bug may teleport you to the beginning
  
• Generous drops everywhere, every time the sames
  
• I can't complain, this is the only sure reputation bonus source
  

"Yeah, after 4h finally Stormshout Brewery"

[/Quote]

 

 

 

[spoiler=Chapter 3: People Are Random Too]

The AFKers

Sometimes known as "walking zombies" for their ability to follow the team without doing any damage to monsters, but mostly they will be blocked by an unknown reason and stop. They pressed "ready to enter" 30sec ago and suddently they realized that they still have something to do.

 

"Damn, I have to take the dog for a walk!"

[/Quote]

 

The Leaver

They feel more honest than AFKers, basically they take it like a sport: join and leave, join and leave... They have various reason to leave

• they don't like your transmog
  
• they have the same transmog
  
• they got the lock to the instance, so they now want to requeque RDF to get Stormshout Brewery
  
• they are too shy to talk
  
• they don't like your dps, even if the instance is going on
  
• the team wiped once, so they feel no point in trying to make anything better
  

"They will never see that I'm missing... La La La"

[/Quote]

"If he left, I can leave too, damn it!"

[/Quote]

"You can do it with 2 DPS, don't worry, just believe in your self and in the double time you'll kill that boss"

[/Quote]

"You can do it with the other healer... ehm, you know, mom is calling for... because she needs me"

[/Quote]

 

The 400+ Guy

He has just met the requirement to join, he is proud of his westland gears and he won't even take them off to take a shower. He knows he could have done before the normal RDF and not the heroic or get contenders, or everything else; but he knows so well his class that he doesn't need better gears.

 

"I need that for me, that for my cousin and that too for the sister of my friend. It's BoP, I know, but I really need it!"

[/Quote]

"What is a Chakra??"

[/Quote]

"I may have alzheimer and lose datas, they can't do so low damage"

[/Quote]

 

International People

 

"Okay, now you got it? Do you know what to do?"

[/Quote]

"нет английского"

[/Quote]

"habla español?"

[/Quote]

"Sorry, English only"

[/Quote]

"Okay, we can go, come on, everyone is ready"

[/Quote]

 

 

 

[spoiler=Chapter 4: Happy Chainsaw Ending]

I joked a bit, but the essence of this story is real and all started from my last Siege of Niuzao: I successfully quequed, lost 1 dps as the very beginning; we continued smoothly, but the 2nd boss took the only good dps... so we did the 3rd and then the healer and the last dps left. Thanks to combat bug I wasn't able to look for more people so I killed the last boss and, since I was alone, no reputation bonus.

 

Sarcasm and self-irony may cheer up the mood of the ones who blame RDF sometimes: I hope you have found this funny and that in your next RDF you'll think to my ones too! It's a game after all...

 

"How did we end again the oil for the anti-AFK chainsaw??!"

[/Quote]

"Please, say I told you I've never been tortured..."

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